22 People Share the Moment They Learned They Were Dating Total Dumb Dumbs

All Dating & Relationships Lifestyle

Not every relationship goes as planned. Sometimes you find yourself months along in a relationship with your partner and only come to realize that they’re absolutely nothing like what you took them for. Human beings are multi-layered. Some layers are more enjoyable to bear witness to than others. Like, if you realize that you’re dating someone who is out there strolling around looking for the nearest spaghetti tree for the night’s dinner, it might be time to reassess.

1. Just a bit wasteful.

A prescription bottle with a yellow cap is tipped over on a wooden surface, spilling small, oval-shaped, blue pills. Some pills remain inside the bottle while others scatter around it in various directions.
Christine Cabalo, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

“When he missed his daily medication, he threw it out instead of just saving it for the next day.” – u/lostinstasis

“Once heard a doctor on a call explaining to a patient that it wasn’t a problem that they took their pill upside down.” – u/blankblank

2. Leaf blowers are the new vacuums.

An orange leaf blower vacuum sits on a grassy surface. It has a extended black nozzle and a large black collection bag attached to its side. Sunlight casts shadows from nearby trees.
chris 論, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“Used the leaf blower to clean the inside of the house.” – u/Towelenthusiast

“I’d have to see the results before passing judgment. I like an innovator.” – u/deleted

3. The dishwasher can’t have pleased.

Open dishwasher with the door fully lowered. The interior is empty and features two racks and a silverware basket. The surrounding kitchen cabinetry is white, and the countertop is beige. Some plumbing is visible under the sink to the left.
Steven Pavlov, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“Stacking cups in a dishwasher.” – u/DoctorWafle

“I would be so mad.” – u/MiaRia

4. Love can be confusing.

A classical marble relief sculpture depicts three draped figures. The central figure appears to be either emerging from or being wrapped in fabric held by the two other figures, each standing on either side, displaying detailed folds in their garments.
Museo nazionale romano di palazzo Altemps , Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

“When she said she loved nothing in the world more than Greek mythology, even got a degree related to Greek mythology from University of Arkansas but had no idea who Prometheus and Achilles were.” – u/No-Subject5232

“Sounds like a liar. I don’t think she went to college. Hopefully.” – u/Existing5742

5. That would be convenient.

Close-up of a showerhead spraying water. The water droplets are captured mid-air against a dark background, highlighting their clarity and movement. The showerhead is silver with a black handle.
turydddu @ Flickr, retouched by JovanCormac, CC BY 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“He thought you absorb a gallon of water when you shower, so he didn’t need to drink water.” – u/Wild_Butterscotch_7

“You do absorb some small amount of water in your skin. But nowhere near a gallon.” – u/Araziah

6. To wake up in that world for one day though.

Close-up of two credit cards layered on top of each other. The top card is a silver ABSA Platinum Visa card, and the bottom card is a gold MasterCard. Both cards have visible numbers, logos, and some text, though the details are out of focus. The background is white.
Lotus Head from Johannesburg, Gauteng, South Africa, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“She didn’t understand that you actually have to pay what you spent on credit cards. Like the credit amount she had was supposed to be her monthly limit that just resets each month.” – u/alphalegend91

“She invented universal basic income, and it worked for her for a while.” – u/ill_be_out_in_a_minu

7. At least he gave it his best shot.

Close-up of a broken egg with the white shell and golden yolk spread out on a dark, smooth surface. The yolk is intact and shiny, surrounded by a translucent egg white. The overall background is dark, highlighting the egg's bright colors.
Balise42, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“When kids egged his car and he thought the best way to get the egg off was to use steel wool.” – u/SassyAhlie

“So dumb. Next time use bacon.” – u/CantTakeMeSeriously

8. That’d be a serious work grind.

Four people stand in front of a wall with the Philips logo. Two individuals wear white lab coats, and the other two are dressed in formal business attire. They appear to be posing for a photo in a professional environment.
Archerysea, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“An ex thought that commercials were recorded live, and the people on TV were employed to do them over and over again.” – u/Kibbles

“This one is incredible.” – u/jelly_belly321

9. Maybe one day though.

A wooden bowl filled with spaghetti topped with a seafood mix, including shrimp and pieces of fish, garnished with herbs. The bowl rests on a textured placemat, accompanied by a fork, knife, and a floral-patterned napkin.
Missvain, CC BY 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“When my ex asked me where they grew spaghetti.” – u/YaBoyfriend

“Jokes on you. He was talking about spaghetti squash.” – u/Few_Permission1036

10. Everyone needs a proper crumpet tray.

A white toaster sits on a speckled countertop beside a dual-sided sponge, one side yellow and the other blue. A white and blue dish towel and a white plate are partially visible on the right side of the frame.
Almanta, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“Calls me at work because her crumpets don’t fit in the crumpet tray under the toaster. Crumpet tray?” – u/Whoopdedobasil

“This one is my actual favorite that I actually laughed out loud for.” – u/hardstyleveins

11. Honestly, that’s just frightening.

Four large white propane tanks are placed outside against a building with dark siding. Green grass and small plants grow around the base of the tanks on a gravel surface. The tanks have black hoses connected to them.
Cantons-de-l’Est, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“The night I said I thought I smelled gas and then they grabbed a lighter and struck it without hesitation.” – u/USR_115

“There’s normal stupid, and there is put your life at risk stupid.” – u/deleted

12. Sounds like she’s a keeper.

Black and white X-ray image of both feet, showing the bones of the toes and metatarsals. The skeletal structure is clearly visible, including the phalanges, metatarsals, and tarsal bones. The image highlights bone density and alignment.
Jmarchn, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“The day I told my girlfriend I think I broke my toe and her solution was to yank on it with all her might. It was gout.” – u/jangasaurus

“This is like a two sentence horror story.” – u/spartanmaybe

13. This is not the way.

A close-up view of a stack of golden brown pancakes on a white plate. Some pancakes are slightly overlapping, showcasing their fluffy and smooth textures. The background is slightly blurred, putting focus on the appetizing pancakes.
Shisma, CC BY 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“When he said he’d make pancakes and put the dry powder directly in the hot pan.” – u/Sims5evr

“It would have been batter if he added water to the mix.” – u/Byting_Wolf

14. She really pulled a fast one on them.

A cluttered desk with tax documents, a calculator, a large book labeled "Income Tax," receipts, and office supplies. The scene reflects the process of preparing for taxes, with various papers spread out and a focus on financial documents.
stevepb, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons

“She refused to pay taxes, have a bank account, or pay for public transport.” – u/GreasyBud

“I mean, personally, that would also be the last red flag.” – u/BionicTriforce

15. Maybe some dinosaurs really breathed fire though.

A Stegosaurus skeleton displayed in a museum setting with a realistic forest backdrop. The skeleton shows prominent back plates and tail spikes, with surrounding greenery adding to the prehistoric ambiance.
Perry Quan from Oakville, Canada, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“We were talking about dinosaurs and he was shocked to hear they were real. Then he proceeded to ask me if they really breathed fire. He thought dinosaurs and dragons were the same thing.” – u/alixnkxng

“To be fair, dragons were likely inspired by dinosaur bones.” – u/deleted

16. Definitely don’t want to have that joint account.

A Fiat and Alfa Romeo car dealership with a large sign displaying both brands' logos. The lot is filled with various cars, primarily in colors like red, white, and silver. Blue promotional banners are visible on the building in the background.

Car dealership, Blackpole by Richard Dorrell, CC BY-SA 2.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“When I overheard her complaining I was too worried about money after she financed a 30K car with an insane interest rate while making $15 an hour.” – u/danknadoflex

“I hope it wasn’t a joint account.” – u/LittleMlem

17. Geography isn’t for everyone.

A detailed political world map with country borders, names, and major cities labeled. The map features labeled oceans, seas, and geographical features such as mountains and rivers. The map is presented in a cylindrical projection with latitudes and longitudes marked.
US Government, Central Intelligence Agency, Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons

“He could not find our country on Europe’s map. The countries were written in bold, and the capitals too.” – u/QueenC7

“The real plot twist was they lived in the Americas.” – u/shaunsnj

18. Oh man, that’s a tough stance.

A professional basketball game is being played in a large indoor arena with a full crowd. The scoreboard shows game statistics, and the court is brightly lit. The venue features several advertisement banners, and spectators are closely watching the action.
Foo030, CC BY-SA 3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“She said playing basketball makes you taller. Her proof was all the tall people playing basketball.” – u/rarawieisdit

“Not the first person I’ve met to imply correlation implies causation.” – u/travelingwhilestupid

19. Unfortunately, it’s almost possible to trace her logic.

An open refrigerator displaying various items, including a red jug of V8 Splash juice on the top shelf, a foil-covered pot, condiments, and sauces. The bottom shelf holds a gallon of milk, cooking oil, juice bottles, and a container of iced tea.
Yinan Chen, Public Domain, via Wikimedia Commons

“My wife would bring stuff home that said refrigerate after opening, open it, and put it in the refrigerator.” – u/overmonk

“I’m so lost on this one.” – u/aupharo

20. Never too late to pick up a book.

A small, cozy room filled with shelves of books lining the walls. There is a wooden chair in one corner and various boxes piled up on the right side. The bookshelves are organized with a wide variety of titles, creating a library-like atmosphere.
Rhagfyr, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“Doing a fun fact about me in a group and his was that he’d never read a book.” – u/UnluckyLimit-7968

“That is a fun fact though.” – u/takeitallback73

21. Stay on your toes, flat earthers are everywhere.

Illustration of a flat Earth model with a dome-shaped sky. The Earth appears as a flat disk with continents and oceans. Inside the dome, celestial bodies like the sun and moon, along with constellations, are visible.
Obrońca Prawdy, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons

“When she told me she was a flat-earth person.” – u/Flimsy-Reaction-5535

“I would break up with someone at that moment. Right after I finished laughing.” – u/LowResults

22. Absolutely a time traveler.

A colorful map of the United States and territories labeled with state names. States are separated by borders and shown in various pastel colors. The map includes mainland U.S. states, as well as Alaska, Hawaii, Puerto Rico, Guam, Northern Mariana Islands, American Samoa, and U.S. Virgin Islands.
User:Dbenbenn, CC BY-SA 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0, via Wikimedia Commons

“She asked me if I could name all 52 states.” – u/Mcshiggs

“Maybe she’s a time traveler.” – u/mirrorspirit

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